You hear a lot about being with the ‘right’ person and how this magical ‘right’ person will make you a ‘better’ person. That’s all very well and good until you come to define ‘right’ and ‘better’.
In my view, there is no ‘right’ person and you don’t become ‘better’ as such. It’s more about where you are in life and who happens to be around you, helping you grow and move to the next stage, not just romantic partner but friends too.
We are always changing as human beings, so instead of thinking of it as finding this ‘right’ person and becoming this ‘better’ person, think of it as being with someone who fits with what you are trying to achieve and who can therefore help you grow.
Now I’m not saying that when you meet new friends or a new partner that you analyse where they fit on your 5 year plan. I mean in terms of whether you hit it off and get a good vibe from that relationship or friendship.
For me, I have always loved music, writing and photography but inevitably sometimes these get dropped in favour of other things. My partner has always encouraged me to pursue my hobbies – he even came up with the title to my current blog posts ‘Bits & Blogs’! And when we moved to a new area together, I joined a new orchestra and got back into my photography. It made me realise how much I had missed it.
When you’re doing things you love, you feel content and happy and that makes you feel good. Some people see this as you being a ‘better’ person but I see it more as just being you. I think we need to get rid of this idea that to be better we have to be happier or blissful in life. In reality, life has its ups and downs, we can’t always be happy but it doesn’t make us any less of a person.
Those who recognise your strengths and the things that make you happy are the ones to keep around. They will be there to help you in the times where your motivation weakens or you lose faith in yourself. They will see your potential and most of all will want to see you succeed.
There are people who will say they want meet up and then there are people who will come and watch you speak at a conference. That’s the difference.