Week 38: You are your own master

Did you know that you have the power to control what happens to you?

It’s called decision-making and all too often we’re not too good at it and we then wonder why things didn’t work out for the best.

This week it dawned on me that when we think of what has happened to us, whether good or bad, it’s usually rooted in a decision we have made, which may have been right or wrong at the time.

If you then come back and complain about something which has happened to you, say a friend has ditched you again. Somewhere along the line, you accepted that person into your life and now, for whatever reason, they no longer fit. You can help yourself and let them go, freeing yourself of any further problems, or you can choose to keep them on. There it is again, a decision.

We make decisions based on the knowledge we have at the time. We’re not psychic, we don’t know what’s around the corner until we get there.

And why are decisions linked to self-confidence?

Because many decisions are based on habits and to break a habit you need to have confidence in yourself in order to take action.

If you want to move forward, you take a step. Likewise if you want to be more confident, you take steps to get there. Making the right decisions paves the path to self-confidence.

To put it in context, this week I had a choice of whether to have a night in or whether to take up a friend’s offer of going out to see a play. My knee-jerk reaction was stay in – it’s short notice, you’re not geared up to go out. But on second thoughts, I hadn’t seen this friend in a while, I hadn’t seen the play before, she would pick me up, so why not?

I chose to go and I had a really lovely time and a good catch up. I found out that she may be leaving town which I wouldn’t have known about if I hadn’t have gone out. Being sociable beats a night in anyday and on this occasion a change of routine was just what the doctor ordered.

Stop making decisions based on what your knee-jerk reaction is and start making decisions that matter and that break your routine.

Be brave. Step out of your comfort zone. Accept the party invite, go for those work drinks, take a day trip out with friends just because you feel like it. Instead of finding reasons to say no, look at what opportunities yes would bring.

Trust your gut instinct, put yourself out there and make yourself better and more confident.

This week I found already that I feel rejuvenated and proud of myself for doing everything I have put myself up to. I’ve realised just how well I can cope and feel confident about doing more things out of my comfort zone.

It’s only fear of the unknown which holds me back and that’s not a good enough reason for me anymore.

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