Week 36: Ditch the drama

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” – Confucius

If you look carefully, you can find drama all around you. Our egos go wild and invent our very own soap opera. But if you notice this, you’ll also know that drama doesn’t help you to be happy.

It might give you a temporary ego boost or provide some gossip for when you catch up with the girls but long-term, it does nothing for your self-confidence and I would argue that actually it has more of a detrimental effect on your self-esteem.

This week I decided to get rid of any unnecessary dramas in my life and rise above it all, focussing on other things and giving myself a focus where my ego was fulfilled enough that it didn’t need to turn anything into a stage-worthy piece.

First of all I worked out what dramas I had going on and unsurprisingly, all three of them involved members of the opposite sex! In some ways, it was then quite easy to work out what to do as all the situations had similar plots and none of them were doing anything for my confidence. What my better judgement was telling me to do was to wipe these guys out of my life once and for all because they weren’t adding anything to my life.

As I’ve written about letting go before, I know it’s not an easy thing to do and even when you think you have the confidence to do it, there are many hurdles to jump over before you can release somebody from you. Most of those niggles are ego-based and really you know exactly what you have to do but life wasn’t made to be simple.

For two of the three, it’s simply a matter of not making any effort and I know for a fact they won’t bother to get in touch again. It’s sad but true and it’s for that very reason that they are going.

For the third one, it’s more of a battle of wills. I know I need to let go for my future happiness and for my overall confidence, however I keep torturing myself with past situations where things have been good and I start to think whether I am doing the right thing. I tend to find flipping to the bad things makes me angry which helps fuel my mission so that’s my tactic I use when I don’t feel as strong. It’s going to be a long process because I don’t feel I can say the words “I have to let you go” out loud to this person, so no doubt there will be numerous attempts to get in touch, however I have to stick to my guns and look ahead, thinking about the person I want to be and that what I am doing is a step in the right direction.

Having people around you who rock your emotions up and down are not true friends. True friends never let you down, are always around and treat you as they would wish to be treated. It has taken me a while to realise that the person in question has fooled me into thinking the good times can cover up all the hurt they have caused. But no more.

Ditching the drama is about releasing things or people from you which don’t help you be you. Isolating the problems that are causing the drama and then solving it means your ego can focus on more worthwhile things.

As my distraction from all this, I have set myself a daily photo challenge with my housemate as well as some fitness goals so I have something else to put my energy into which is as far away from any drama as I could possibly get.

Life is really simple, so now is the time to enjoy it, rather than making a mountain out of a molehill.

Wish me luck!

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