Week 18: Positivity as a way of life not just a way of thinking

“Minds are like flowers, they only open when the time is right.”  – Stephen Richards

Week 18 was the week where I felt like I’d turned over a new leaf. Things went from being out of reach to achievable and things that had previously been a puzzle to me became clear.

And why? It was all in my mind, I changed the way I thought about things.

From worrying and obsessing over why someone hasn’t responded to a message to trying to analyse even the simplest sentence someone says, we all have a certain perception of people’s actions towards us.

These small things, which to the other person are trivial become a three hour analytics session in your mind, and the only person they hurt is yourself. And so I decided that I wasn’t going to hurt myself anymore, I was going to take control of my mind and force myself to change my perception of things.

It all started with some positive self-talk, which, believe me, is not an easy process. For everything I told myself I was good at, there was a little voice in my head telling me something contradictory. However, I worked hard at it and wrote a long list of everything I liked about myself and things I was proud of. I then wrote down my weaker areas and wrote down ways I wanted to improve them.

Instead of getting down about the bad bits, I stuck to my positive thoughts and began to realise that the fact I had acknowledged weaknesses was a way to move forward and that gave me an instant boost.

With the positive thoughts, positive mindset and positive outlook, it was no wonder that this week I reaped the rewards. I got compliments from people and took them seriously, I smiled and people smiled back, someone told me they thought I had developed as a person even over the last couple of months and I believed them.

Yes, actually I should be proud of myself. I have achieved a lot and have worked hard to get where I am. The more I tell myself, the more I believe it and the less I hear that niggling little voice in my head.

I can’t tell you exactly how you do it because I think you have to be ready to accept yourself as well, but thinking positive is certainly a way of life, not just a way of thinking. Similar to the difference between a diet and a lifestyle change, to reap the benefits of it, you have to work at it and make it a part of your life, not just an occasional optimistic moment.

Of course, it goes hand in hand with surrounding yourself with new people, with friends and with family as well as enjoying things at work, achieving something new or doing something kind or selfless.

However, some would argue that if the thinking is in place, the actions follow – perhaps that’s more of a chicken and egg argument?

Either way, I would say this has been a good week and I will be continuing to practice my positivity for the coming weeks. It will be interesting to see how the bad days fare now.

 

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