Making friends and building relationships

Relationships are the single most important thing in life. I’m not talking just about happy couples, or family relationships, I mean building relationships with anyone and everyone. People are everything.

Many companies pride themselves on building good customer relationships and quite rightly so. Customers are king. However, how hard can it be to make someone like you? After all that is the very basis of relationships. You get on with people who you like and who like you. The feeling’s mutual.

Similarly in the wonderful world of dating, you go out with people who you like and who enable you to be ‘a better version of yourself’ as someone once said to me. It’s not all about good looks then. So, if we are capable of making people like us, why is it so difficult to gauge whether we are compatible enough with someone for a long lasting relationship?

For anyone who has had the ‘do they like me?’ dilemma, you are not alone. A Google search tells us that there are many others out there who are wondering the same thing all over the world. It’s not difficult for everyone, of course, some people meet their match and that’s them sorted, however the majority of people I have spoken to have not always had instant success with a potential partner and it’s certainly not a reflection of their people skills.

Perhaps it’s just whether you ‘click’ or not. Then again, everyone has up and down days. One day you may feel that connection and then another day you’re ill or tired and you feel you’re about as far apart as possible. This doesn’t just happen with dating but with friends as well. We all have bad days when we don’t pay as much attention to our dear friends or don’t make the effort to go to someone’s party and it’s (generally) not because we don’t like them.

It seems that our ability to build relationships depends a great deal on how we have worked on ourselves, in terms of our mindset, our outlook and how we feel when we wake up in the morning. There we have it, that word feelings. Feelings are the very reason that we can and do build or break relationships with people whether it’s colleagues, family, partners or friends.

In the words of Stephen R Covey: “Our greatest joy and our greatest pain comes in our relationships with others.

I would be inclined to agree.


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